A Milestone Weekend: My 30th Birthday and 1st Mother's Day

Happy Hump Day! I hope you're having a lovely week, had a lovely weekend, and to all the mothers I wish a belated happy Mother's Day. To those of you who, like me, celebrated your very first Mother's Day, I'm sending a special hug and happy smiles. This Sunday was certainly a joyous occasion, and although nothing incredibly exciting was planned, I thoroughly enjoyed the relaxing, calm day I spent with my little family. We got to visit my own mother, spent several hours at home just enjoying the company of each other on our new deck, and ended the day with a special surprise visit from my mother-in-law. It was really a perfect day, full of love and free of expectations.

Before I celebrated this milestone Mother's Day, though, I celebrated another milestone: my 30th birthday. Up until this point, for the past several years, I have kept my age a closely guarded secret. I didn't do it because I was ashamed of my age, but because I didn't like the idea that people who asked to know it were trying to use that information as a gauge for my status and accomplishments in life. For example, sometimes you'll hear people talk about some prodigy like, "He's only 20 and he's already bought his first house!" Or you'll hear the opposite, as in, "She's already 27 and she hasn't settled down yet." I just didn't like the idea that my age had to define me in any way, so when people asked, I politely declined to answer by smiling and replying, "I'm old enough." (That phrase evolved as the years went on, I should confess, from "old enough to know better.") Sometimes I would get a little ballsy and reply, "I'm almost 30," but I used that phrase long before it was really accurate. In the months leading up to my 30th birthday, however, I began to feel excited as I wondered how I would respond to this question going forward. And I realized something: I was looking forward to turning 30, and I had no problem sharing that information.

A Little Thirty Never Hurt Anybody
In the days just before my birthday, as I was running last minute errands and preparing for a birthday bash, I told every stranger who opened up a conversation about my weekend plans that I would be celebrating my first Mother's Day and turning 30. Everyone seemed duly excited for me, and I basked in the warmth I received. The night before my birthday, I had some friends and family over for a celebration, and had more fun than I've had in a while. (More on that spectacular party later.) So many people congratulated me on turning 30, and for me it really felt appropriate to be congratulated. My family knows I went through some dark times in my 20s, and those who are closest to me know a secret: I never wanted to make it to 30. Before the party started, I sat on the couch with my mom, reflecting on how different my life is now, how truly amazing it is that I'm here, alive, and happy. We shared some tears and some laughs, cuddling the sweet Scoops in my lap and marvelling that there had been a time when I was so incredibly dissatisfied with my life that I wanted it to be over. I feel like a completely different person now. I'm so in love with life, my husband, and my sweet baby. I'm in love with myself. I like who I see when I look in the mirror. I know I'm a good person, and I strive to be good to others. This desire for goodness perpetuates itself, so that the more I want it, the better I become, and the better person I become, the more I want to be a better person.

So this is how I entered my 30s. Rather than feeling terrified of getting older, or lamenting the crinkles forming around my eyes, or mourning the loss of my youth, I felt like I was approaching a rite of passage into adulthood. Probably the fact that my first Mother's Day came along with this milestone birthday helped cement that feeling, but I think I would have felt the same even if they were on separate weekends. The party was a chance for me to dance and be loud and sip champagne, and generally party like a 20-something would. I reveled in the fun and attention from friends and family, and had an appropriately great time. My actual birthday, the following day, was a time of quiet reflection on the strides I've taken towards creating the best life for myself; to calmly enjoy the company of my husband and daughter in the present moment; and to eagerly look forward to the years ahead, which I'm sure will only get better with the unique challenges and rewards they bring. I anticipated my birthday by saying "a little thirty never hurt anybody," and I still feel that way. We can't slow down time, we can't go backwards, and we can't fast forward. We can only be in the present moment. And the present moment is turning out to be exactly where I'm supposed to be, and I love it. My aunt told me that my Terrible Twenties are now behind me, and she's right. I feel like I've really come into myself, full of love and acceptance, and completely comfortable with who and where I am in life.

My 1st Mother's Day
After a full 24+ hours of birthday celebrations, I was ready to celebrate my new status as a mommy. Spending time with my own mom was a great time to hear her recount her experiences raising me, and to celebrate all the joys I encounter daily while raising my own daughter. I felt more firmly on this special day what I felt as soon as Scoops was born, what I knew while I was pregnant with her, and what I sensed even as a child: motherhood is my calling. I was always meant to be a mommy. It seems so cliche, but it's 100% true. Even while I denied it for many years and at one point swore I'd never have kids, a part of me has always known that I was destined to be a mom. Not until my daughter was born did I fully understand that truth. Everything I've read or been told about parenthood is true: it is hard, it is work, and it is by far the most enjoyable job on the planet. I wouldn't trade this for the world. I never thought I'd be so content to be woken at ungodly hours, to listen to annoying cries, or to clean up so many scoops of poops. This little girl means everything to me, and I can't imagine life without her. 

A few months before I got pregnant, a colleague did a card reading for me, just for fun, and the cards she pulled, from two different decks, both indicated major change was just around the corner. They both discussed a coming of age event, a rite of passage, a transition to full adulthood. I cried as she read the cards to me, because I had been struggling with knowing whether it was the right time for my husband and I to start to grow our family. I wasn't sure I was ready to really grow up, become responsible for another person, and leave my adolescence decidedly behind me. This felt like a solid omen, and about a month later I had a very clear experience telling me to start trying in January. We did, and the rest is history. Ironically, I ran into that colleague this Mother's Day while I was out with my husband and daughter. She was delighted to meet Scoops, we briefly caught up, and then she was on her way. I find it incredibly poignant that I saw her on my first Mother's Day, when I haven't seen her in several months. It's almost like the universe was confirming that everything is going exactly according to the master plan.

As a kid, I always found it annoying that my birthday fell on or around Mother's Day. I didn't like having to share my birthday with another holiday (or my mom), and my friends often couldn't attend my parties if they were spending the weekend away with their mothers. When I realized my 30th birthday would fall adjacent to my first Mother's Day, though, it seemed fitting. Turning 30 and becoming a mother are both excellent times to make the transition to full adulthood. And of course I was born around Mother's Day. I was always meant to be a mother. 

DIY Baby Handprint Craft

Pretty much since the moment I brought Scoops home from the hospital, I've been pining for a keepsake handprint. We got her footprints from the hospital, and my doula made a cute footprint keepsake for us when Scoops was a few weeks old, but I wanted a handprint to remind me when she is bigger of just how tiny those little hands and fingers were when they first wrapped around my finger. I bought one of those mess-free impression kits to try to make a handprint around Christmas time, before Scoops was 2 months old. Those of you who are not new at this parenting thing are laughing at me right now. That's fine, I deserve it. For those of you who haven't had a baby yet, let me just tell you how freaking impossible it is to get a newborn to open up her hand. So I tried that impression kit, the one sold at big box stores, the one "they" encourage expecting moms to add to the baby registry. I tried a good several times, but the kit failed me. If I managed to get a decent print, it wasn't deep enough and faded away within a few minutes. Most of the times I tried it, though, Scoops just closed her fist, grabbing the material and gouging a huge chunk out of the center. I thought about trying homemade salt dough, but the benefit to the kit is that it was mess-free. I'm pretty sure that using salt dough would have resulted in a fistful of sticky mess between my kid's fingers and palm. (Plus, at 2 months postpartum, I didn't really have the energy for a salt dough project.)

So I've been waiting, semi-patiently, for the first possible opportunity to get a handprint from Scoops. I told my husband that's all I want for my first Mother's Day, actually. But recently I noticed Scoops getting a little more focused and thoughtful with her grasping technique, and I thought maybe I could use that to my advantage. I started thinking of objects she could gently grab that would allow me to get a quick handprint, and came up with the idea to have her grab a papier-mâché Easter egg. Too bad I couldn't find one, but at Easter brunch my Aunt gave me a nice, large decorative egg for this project (it's lightweight, so... foam?). Fantastic! Free craft supplies! I decided a toilet paper tube would be the perfect thing for a test run, and my test prints actually turned out better than the final product, in my opinion. 

Just like my Christmas craft from January, I created this Easter craft after the actual holiday. It's less stressful that way, and you can get supplies on sale. If you don't have a holiday coming up and you're itching for a handprint like I was, you can just use a toilet paper tube for this craft (stay with me). Here's what you'll need for this project:

• a small paintbrush (mine is about 1/2" wide)
• something in which to mix paint - e.g. a palette, carryout container or lid, clean yogurt cup, paper plate
• paint (I used acrylic - white mixed with a little gold)
• baby wipes, or damp paper towels or rags
• toilet paper tube
• decorative egg or other rounded object (optional)
• optional - drinking glass (to hold your egg while it dries)

Step 1
Pull out at least a couple baby wipes (or damp paper towels or rags) and have them ready to tackle a certain small painted hand that'll undoubtedly be heading straight for a certain small curious mouth. As a frame of reference, I ended up using 7 baby wipes.

Step 2
In your palette or other mixing container, mix up your paint a few drops at a time until you get a color you like. I ended up with about a tablespoon of paint. (If you found a color you like, you can of course use it straight out of the bottle. Just give yourself a tablespoon or so in a palette so it's easier to dip your brush.)

Step 3
Holding baby's wrist with your non-dominant hand, use the paintbrush to spread a little paint onto baby's palm. If her hand is closed, brushing a little paint at the very base of the palm will likely get those fingers to relax and open up. It's ok if baby tries to grab the brush and squishes the paint around a bit, just make sure you get paint all the way to the ends of the fingers. 

Step 3
Still holding on to baby's wrist set your paintbrush aside. Present your toilet paper tube to baby and entice her to open up her hand and grab it. You may want to try this a couple times to get a feel for how firmly your baby will grasp, and how long she'll hold her grasp before she starts to move her fingers around (I did 2 test prints, both on the same tube). If the tube is your final project, you may want to have a backup tube or 2 on hand in case you're not happy with the results of your first attempt(s).

Step 4
If you're using another object for your final project, add a little more paint to baby's hand to make sure it's well covered, then still holding on to baby's wrist present the decorative egg (or other roundish object) to baby. Once baby grasps the object, gently but immediately remove it from baby's hand. *Note: my egg was covered in a lovely metallic foil, which made it much more slippery than a cardboard toilet paper tube. The downside of this is that it was harder to get a good print before Scoops' fingers started slipping all over the thing. The upside is that it was super easy to wipe the paint off with a baby wipe and start over. 

Step 5
Once you're satisfied with your print, set it aside (I balanced my egg on top of the toilet paper tube so it wouldn't roll around, but you could use a drinking glass if you want something more sturdy) and wipe baby's hand thoroughly with the baby wipe. When you don't see any more paint on baby's hand, head to the sink to wash off any residue that you might have missed. 

Step 6
When the paint is dry, you can personalize your project even further by using a permanent marker, or extra paint if you're artistically inclined, to add baby's name and the date or occasion to the back of your object. If the toilet paper tube is your final project, you can use scissors to cut a line up the back of the tube, flatten the tube into a rectangle, and then cut out the print you want to keep. Paste the cut out print onto decorative paper or card stock and frame it, add it to a shadow box, or put it in a scrapbook.

A few tips to make this project less of a headache:

I guess I should mention that I had Scoops in her high chair for this, and used the kitchen table to hold all my supplies. I honestly can't think of a better way to do this project. You really probably want your kid strapped into a chair that's at a reasonable height for you to stand next to, and near a table or other work surface.

If you have someone to help you with this either by handing you items as you need them or holding baby's paint-covered hand for you, that's ideal. I did this on my own, so it can be done, but it would have been much easier if I'd had another adult helping me! 

I highly recommend removing baby's clothes and having her wear a large bib you don't care about ruining. You probably want to wear clothes you don't care about as well.

Protect your work area with old towels, a drop-cloth, or newspaper, or do this project outside. (Honestly, I skipped this step, but that's because I'm incredibly impatient and kinda DGAF. I did at least lay down a paper towel on which to set my damp, painty supplies.) You may also want to do this near a sink, or have a bowl of clean water nearby to wash up baby and yourself immediately after.

Don't try this with a baby that hasn't been working on grasping much yet. Scoops is just under 6 months old, and I really don't think we could have pulled this off any sooner.

Let go of the illusion that this might come out perfectly. I don't know where those clever marketing people at Pearhead got their images, but I'm guessing it's either Photoshop or witchcraft. You'll get a handprint, and it'll likely be smudgy and imperfect. Accept and love that. I had a near-perfect print the first time, but decided it wasn't perfect enough and ended up causing myself and Scoops major frustration by wiping it off and trying another 5 times before I got a print that was almost as good as the first one.

If you try this project, let me know how it went! I'd love to read your stories (successful or otherwise) in the comments and see photos if you'd like to share!

Scoops' 1st Easter

This post is a little delayed, but hey, life. You get it. So how was your Easter? Did you make baskets for your babies? Scoops really enjoyed her basket, and actually seemed a little interested in discovering the contents on her own, rather than waiting for me to pull them out of the basket for her. I underestimated her curiosity! Here's a photo of the final product:

Sunglasses, a small toy, and a plush bunny: a perfectly sweet first Easter basket!

I ended up not using the notebooks I mentioned in my last post because they'll be more fun for Scoops when she can color in them. She also got lots of presents from family members, most notably the Pat the Bunny book I asked Grandma to give her. It brought back fond memories of my childhood (not that I remember actually having it read to me as a baby, but I remember seeing it later and hearing about how it was read to me as a baby). Here she is opening her Easter basket and enjoying her gifts:

 

And here she is starting to get a little overwhelmed by the sudden onslaught of gifts from pretty much everyone in attendance:

Hopefully she doesn't get used to that. I'm certainly not planning on having a second helping of Christmas gifts every Easter. She seemed to have a good day, though, and handled all the attention very well. It was good for me, too, to let Grandma show her off a bit to friends at church, let so many other people hold her and cuddle her and fawn over her, and to just take a step back and know that she was safe and in good hands. I've never felt more protective of anyone or anything in my life, but I'm starting to relax a little more now that she's older. It feels good to let go a little. Just a little, though, because she's still little. If nothing else, I'm practicing patience with myself in learning to let go and be more trusting!

Did you celebrate Easter? How was it? Were you around lots of people? If you're a new parent, was that scary for you (and did you pass your baby around)? If not, how have you learned to relax and let go (seriously, what's your secret)?

Baby's First Easter: Basket Ideas

Easter is almost here, and Scoops will be just shy of 6 months old when the fluffy patron saint of pastel candy makes his rounds. I wasn't going to make her an Easter basket, but then I found some cute miniature Dr. Seuss books in the dollar bin at Target and decided, meh, what the heck. (Side note: I also almost didn't give her any Christmas gifts since she was only a little over 2 months old then and I knew she wouldn't be able to unwrap anything or know what was going on. What was I thinking? I ended up feeling compelled to buy her some books and a few small toys, and now she loves them! Duh, mommy. The gifts will be there for her to play with when she's ready in a couple months! And books are pretty much never a bad idea.) I also found a cute pair of sunglasses, which I figured were necessary since the sun is often out now and Scoops' head is too frickin' tiny to properly support most brimmed hats for her age group. (Seriously, she's in, like, the first percentile for head circumference. It's daddy's fault, he has a tiny head, too. But hey, I'm not complaining!) Admittedly, I already used the sunglasses for her first beach day last weekend, but since she's not going to know the difference, I'm still planning to put them in her Easter basket. 

I figured I should probably look for ideas to add a few more items to the basket, and thought I'd share my findings with you. Here is a little round up of 5 Easter basket ideas from around the Web. I'm pulling a little inspiration from all of these!

These charming items suggested by Sara at Running from the Law would make a chic Easter basket for a new baby. She also has an inspiration board for an equally cute toddler Easter basket.

I like the no-fuss simplicity of this basket from Sierra and Faith over at Winks and Eyerolls. Practical items, but fun as well. (This is actually the same basket I'll be using for Scoops!)

This sweet pink basket from Jenny at Richly Blessed is honestly a little too frilly and full for my taste, personally, but I love some of the items she's included. I'm particularly fond of the Pat the Bunny book. If I could find my copy that was given to me as a baby, I'd put that in Scoops' basket for sure!

I love all the non-candy items Julie, from the girl in the red shoes, used in this adorable basket. Sensible items, like a sippy cup and socks, and fun stuff, like bubbles and a plush toy, strike a nice balance here.

And lastly, this super chic shopping guide from Kate at The Shopping Mama is simply beautiful. I like that she's also listed the approximate price of each item included, so you can plainly see how easy it is to put together a $100+ Easter basket! ;-)

I did feel inspired to get a pretty wooden toy like the ones shown in Kate's list, and found this Baby Car from Plan Toys at a local shop (shout out to Granola Babies!). It was $15, but it's the only "expensive" thing I'm putting in the basket. I'm also adding a plush bunny, as a few of the inspiration baskets above have, that a Great Aunt of mine gifted me at my baby shower. Scoops hasn't played with it yet since she's pretty easily entertained by the same few toys right now, so I think this is the perfect time to introduce it to her. I'm using a basket that's been lying around the house not being used, and I'll decorate it with paper "grass" and ribbon saved from previous projects and gifts received in the past (I save almost all packaging from gifts I've been given - everything can be used at least twice!). Here's what I've got to work with, about a $25 total investment after sales tax:

Turns out those cute little books are actually blank notebooks (way to read the packaging, mama), so I think I'll wait to give them to Scoops until she can effectively wield a crayon. Hey, maybe Grandma will buy a Pat the Bunny book I can throw in there instead. :-) Even without a book, this sweet little basket will have 3 nice gifts inside it. Easter shouldn't rival Christmas in terms of gifts, in my opinion. I'm just happy to mark the special occasion of my sweet Scoops' first Easter with a cheerful little set of small gifts for her.

UPDATE: Click here to see the finished product!

Are you putting together an Easter basket for your little one? How old will she or he be this Easter? What items are you including in the basket?